If you are, take your time. It’s a huge step. Marriage is something that should take time and very careful consideration. However long you have been partnered or married, you owe your partner/spouse and children, if you have them, to give it all you’ve got.
Have you thought about your significant other’s critiques of you and if you could make some changes to improve the relationship? If you have already tried everything – talking with your partner/spouse, marital counseling – here are some questions to ask yourself before you take your first divorce step.
Do you choose to divorce respectfully so neither you nor your spouse/partner and certainly not, your children, feel destroyed by the process? Do you want decisions to be made by the two of you and not by lawyers or a judge? Do you want it not to drag on? Is keeping the fees down important?
If the above are your goals, can you:
* Give up blaming, the negative past, ‘ego’ and anger?
* Bring your best self to the table?
* Focus on the big picture?
* Find room in your heart for empathy ?
* Learn to control your emotions?
Are you ready, able and willing for some hard, but worthwhile work?
Do you think your partner/spouse could do the same?
If you want to divorce respectfully and make your own decisions on your schedule, consensual dispute resolution, more specifically, collaborative divorce, is an opportunity to be considered. Collaborative professionals: attorneys, divorce coaches and child specialists, as well as financial experts, are trained in mediation and the collaborative method to help you through this difficult experience in a manner that can leave parents and children feeling whole as they transition through the divorce experience. The collaborative divorce professionals can also be available to assist you with post divorce issues that may arise..
You can make coming apart less painful….your choice.